Well, it's that time of the year. Reportcards come out, spring has sprung, and you have to make the choice what highschool to attend next year, and now, I am thouroughly confused. My science marks and my math marks are gunna be terrible. Spring so far, is wet and gorss, and i have no idea what highschool to apply for. Well, actaully, no. That's a lie. I want to go to the same highschool that my friend DreamDay is going to (i wont put the name for the privacy purposes. but it's not like anyone reads this. so yeah.) but my parents are making me apply to a highschool, i REALLY dont want to go to. So i'm stuck. I could say I applied to the school my parents want me to go to, but not actaully, and then I'll get to go to my school. But i would feel terrible for lying to them. I could still apply, but do it last minuite, so that i wont have as much of a chance of getting in as i would if i applied right away, or i could just go to the school my parents want me to go to. MOST LIKELY CHOICE? I'll probably just apply really late, and hope and pray that i dont get into the school my parents want me to go to. I'm terrible huh. I hate having to make choice, and decisions that go against what my parents want for me. But i want to make my own choices, and they still treat me like a baby. I want to be independent, but they wont let me. Sometimes i think they're just trying to ruin my life, and keep me from making choices, but other times i think that they have thier reasons for having restritions on everything. Most of the time tho. I hate my parents. I dont want to be around them, or have to talk to them, or even be around them. I would much rather be with my friends, or even my sister (and that's saying something). They just irritate me right now. And i feel terrible for saying that, but it's true. I love my parents, don't get me wrong, but i can't STAND them.
Why the hell must my life be so confusing? geeze. x_x
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Decisions, decisions, decisions.
What to choose what to choose what to choose. Which high school to go to? Which classes to take? Which boy to like? Which dress to buy? Which day to ditch school? lol jk about the last one. I hate choices. Because i fail at decision making. I need someone to tell me what to draw. or write about. or how to do a math problem. Mostly I'm worried because me and all my best friends are all going to different schools. Like. How lame is that? Me and one of my friends are being forced to go to cirten highschools becasuse or parents (or guardian in her case) is making us. My other friend has uber high standards, and is going to a smart shcool. And my other friend is going to a cirten highschool becase his sister goes there. I can only see two good things about this (going to different high schools i mean). And one of them doesn't really apply to me. I shall explain.
1) We get to make new friends. I am TERRIBLE at making friends. I'm actaully surpisingly shy when it comes to meeting new people. I mean. It took me almost 7 years to become friends with one of my now BEST friends. The other one (the guy) i actaully hated when i first met, and didn't really talk to him till grade 6. My other best friend and i were really different for a while. We had different cliques hung out with different people. Had different standards and likes. But now. We are best friends. (See what i mean?) And my other friend, whose really close, i dind't really talk to, and i mean like secrest and stuff till last year. Before we were just good good friends. Now she too, is one of my best friends.
2) I forget what i was going to say xD lol. But i'm sure it was a good idea at the time that i thought of it. But the point of the matter hasn't changed. I AM FREAKING SCARED OUT OF MY WITS OF GOING TO HIGHSCHOOL. I am terrified. TERRIFIED. I will be shy, self concious, mean, closed off, judgemental, basically all the things i have worked on NOT being this year. I will be so foucused on trying to make friends, my grade will suffer, an di might not even make firends. What a raw deal? On the plus side. Me and my best friends don't like that far apart from eachother, so there is a better chance of us keeping in contact. If i loose contact with my friends, i will die. They are so close to me, i feel like they are like fmaily. I can tell them ANYTHING, and they will support me. They are honest with me, they laugh with me (not at me. well...not always xD), they're my friends. I would die wihtout them. And i just might.
The highshcool I am being forced to go to, is huge. Therefore Daunting. A.KA. The end of my life. I hope i find at least one friend. And another thing. Is it really fair to force someone to take Physics when they dont want to. I have a strong dislike for science right now, and math. I want to be an english teacher. ENGLISH TEACHERS DONT NEED SCIENCES IN UNIVERSITY. SO HA.
Another confession i have while i'm confessing right now is that i really hope i dont cry on the last day of school. But i probably will. Another confession i have is that i hope i get kissed. Stupid, i know, cheesy, i know. But I REALLY WANT TO. I've been thinking about it for a while. And i have no idea who i want to kiss me. So long as it's no one gross I'm good. lol. haha. I'm so shallow. But if I don't get kissed, then i will kiss the boy of my choosing. I have no idea who (like i said before), but i'll eventaully like someone in my school. I hope. If not, i will get ownd xD.
Anyways. I hate decisions. And that is final.
1) We get to make new friends. I am TERRIBLE at making friends. I'm actaully surpisingly shy when it comes to meeting new people. I mean. It took me almost 7 years to become friends with one of my now BEST friends. The other one (the guy) i actaully hated when i first met, and didn't really talk to him till grade 6. My other best friend and i were really different for a while. We had different cliques hung out with different people. Had different standards and likes. But now. We are best friends. (See what i mean?) And my other friend, whose really close, i dind't really talk to, and i mean like secrest and stuff till last year. Before we were just good good friends. Now she too, is one of my best friends.
2) I forget what i was going to say xD lol. But i'm sure it was a good idea at the time that i thought of it. But the point of the matter hasn't changed. I AM FREAKING SCARED OUT OF MY WITS OF GOING TO HIGHSCHOOL. I am terrified. TERRIFIED. I will be shy, self concious, mean, closed off, judgemental, basically all the things i have worked on NOT being this year. I will be so foucused on trying to make friends, my grade will suffer, an di might not even make firends. What a raw deal? On the plus side. Me and my best friends don't like that far apart from eachother, so there is a better chance of us keeping in contact. If i loose contact with my friends, i will die. They are so close to me, i feel like they are like fmaily. I can tell them ANYTHING, and they will support me. They are honest with me, they laugh with me (not at me. well...not always xD), they're my friends. I would die wihtout them. And i just might.
The highshcool I am being forced to go to, is huge. Therefore Daunting. A.KA. The end of my life. I hope i find at least one friend. And another thing. Is it really fair to force someone to take Physics when they dont want to. I have a strong dislike for science right now, and math. I want to be an english teacher. ENGLISH TEACHERS DONT NEED SCIENCES IN UNIVERSITY. SO HA.
Another confession i have while i'm confessing right now is that i really hope i dont cry on the last day of school. But i probably will. Another confession i have is that i hope i get kissed. Stupid, i know, cheesy, i know. But I REALLY WANT TO. I've been thinking about it for a while. And i have no idea who i want to kiss me. So long as it's no one gross I'm good. lol. haha. I'm so shallow. But if I don't get kissed, then i will kiss the boy of my choosing. I have no idea who (like i said before), but i'll eventaully like someone in my school. I hope. If not, i will get ownd xD.
Anyways. I hate decisions. And that is final.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
